Where will I turn?
by bkabat
Summary: Nathan & Peyton. Complete. Everyone is gone for the summer except for Peyton, Nathan & Deb. Peyton feels alone and turns back to Coke for a friend. When she decides she can't use drugs anymore Deb & Nathan take her in. Can Peyton & Nathan start over to
1. Say Hello To Old Habits

**Chapter One-Say Hello To Old Habits.**

The chalky white powered sat on the table forming itself into a small pile. The glass pressed hard into the table as tears mixed in with the wood. Peyton snorted the line and closed her eyes. She never imagined she could resort back to this. She walked to her bed and lay down. She knew she wouldn't sleep for days. She didn't care.

Jake was gone. Once again he had left her on his quest to find Jenny. She knew he wasn't coming back. He had to go. She understood that.

Brooke was in California for the summer. She missed her. Not as much as she thought she would. That was only because when she was in Tree Hill she was spending most of her time with Jake instead of Brooke anyway.

Lucas was in New York. When Dan was killed he went with Haley on tour for the summer. Nathan and Haley's marriage had been annulled. Nathan wouldn't take her back. Lucas was just trying to get away.

Karen was out of the country with Andy. She had been desperately trying to find away to bring him back into the states.

Deb was managing the café. She had hired someone to help Peyton with Tric until Karen returned. Peyton hadn't met her yet.

Keith hadn't returned since his wedding. Nobody knew where he was. People stopped questioning it.

Larry had lied to her. He said he was only taking local jobs. She hadn't seen him in months. He was working.

Nathan was the only one left in Tree Hill. She hadn't seen much of him. He was living with Deb and didn't leave the house much. He was really depressed after everything that happened with Haley.

Peyton was alone. Tree Hill never felt so lonely. She spent most of her days crying, but today that would end. Today she would be happy. She suppressed her loneliness with Coke. She knew what she was doing was wrong. She didn't care.

She remembered the day in the beginning of the summer when she was told she was adopted. Her father had gotten another woman pregnant. Peyton's dead mother wasn't her mother at all. She was her adopted mother. That was the day she started doing coke again. The woman who was her real mother didn't stay in her life. She had given her up for adoption the day she was born. She wanted to see Peyton, but she didn't stick around. Why would she? Nobody else ever did.

Peyton decided to go for a walk. The river court was empty. Peyton had never seen a sight like that. Not even skills or Mouth were there. Nobody was. Everybody was living their lives, enjoying their summer, and happy, everyone but Peyton.

Deb was turning the lights to the café off when Peyton entered. "Hey." She smiled. "What are you doing here so late?"

Peyton shrugged. She was really jittery. She had never had such an effect from a line of coke. She felt scared. She had no one else to turn to. "Deb, can I talk to you for a second?" she asked.

Deb nodded. She let Peyton take a seat at the counter. "Do you want something to eat?"

Peyton shook her head. "No." she knew she couldn't eat. Everything tasted like glue when she on coke. She was loosing weight rapidly, and she was starting to feel as if she needed it every day to live.

"You should really eat something. You're becoming so thin." Deb noticed.

Peyton nodded. "Deb?" she asked her quietly. "I need your help."

"What is it?" Deb asked worried. She sat down next to Peyton and held her arm. "You're freezing!" She ran to grab a blanket from one of the couches. "Here, cover yourself up." She said wrapping the blanket around her.

"I've been doing Coke." She admit. She was shaking uncontrollably now. "I don't know what to do." She cried. "I thought I could talk to you. I mean, since you were in rehab and everything."

Deb's eye lit up. She never expected a confession like that out of Peyton. She had to do something to help this poor girl.

Peyton let Deb hug her. She was nervous, at the closeness between the two. She didn't know Deb the best. She knew her from Karen and the Café but she had hardly even met her when she was with Nathan.

"You're coming home with me." She instructed Peyton. "Nathan's home, but he doesn't venture out of his room much. He won't even know you're there." She told her. "We have to get you some help."

Peyton let this happen. She had no idea why now. She wanted to get off the drugs.

Nathan was rummaging through the fridge when he heard his mom come in. "Mom?" he called. "Don't you ever think about grocery shopping?" he walked to the door where he saw his mom helping Peyton to the couch. Peyton was shaking and crying. He quickly ran to help his mother.

"I thought you said Nathan never left his room?" Peyton questioned looking up at the two of them from the couch.

Nathan glanced at his mother in question. Deb shrugged acting as if she didn't know what was going on.

Peyton kept the blanket wrapped tight around her body. She watched Deb take Nathan into the kitchen. She knew she was going to tell Nathan about the coke. She didn't even care anymore. She needed the help.

Nathan came back and sat on the couch next to Peyton. "Hey." He said pulling her close to him as she shook.

"Hey." She said back vulnerable. "Sorry to bother you and Deb." She whispered.

Nathan shook his head. "You're not bothering us." He looked into her scared dark eyes. "Peyton, why didn't you tell me?"

She shrugged and closed her eyes. "I'm alone Nathan. I have nobody to talk to. You have been trying to deal with everything in your own life. I wasn't about to bother you with my problems."

Nathan shook his head. "You can always talk to me Peyton. Do you want me to leave you alone so you can sleep this off?" he asked.

Peyton shook her head no. "I won't be able to sleep for days." She wined.

Nathan had heard coke kept you up a lot but luckily he had never tried it. "I'll stay with you." He promised her. She nodded her head and laid it on her shoulder. As awkward as she expected the situation to be, it wasn't. It was rather comforting.


	2. Breakfast

**Chapter Two-Breakfast**

Peyton ate a few bites of the cereal Deb left out for her. She had woken up on the couch a few hours earlier with Nathan sleeping by her side. She hadn't expected to fall asleep. She wasn't even sure how it was possible, but she was happy she had fallen asleep.

It was uncomfortable being in Nathan's house again, especially under the circumstances. She just finished her cereal when Nathan sat down next to her. "Hey." He smiled watching her dump the bowl of milk down the sink.

"Hey." She smiled back. "Listen, thanks for sitting with me last night."

"It's not a problem." He agreed. He noticed how skinny she was becoming. She had been skinny in the first place. Now she was bony. "Do you want to talk about anything?"

"Not really." She told him. "Do you?"

"What do you mean?"

"Haley." She said even though she knew he already knew.

Nathan shook his head no.

"Okay then. This is .. awkward. I'm just gonna go."

"Wait," Nathan stopped her. "Don't go."

"Why?"

"Obviously you came to my mom because you wanted her help. Why would you leave now?"

"I don't want to get in her way Nathan. I don't want to get in yours either."

"You're not in our way. Peyton, we're friends right? That's what friends are for."

"Are we friends Nathan? We haven't spoken all summer."

"I know." He sighed regretfully. "I'm sorry. I've just been so caught up with Haley, and my dad." He paused.

"It's okay. I don't expect it. You're a great guy Nathan. You deserve better than Haley. Even if she is my friend. Or was my friend."

Nathan nodded. "I know." Peyton started to gather her things to leave again. "Wait." He stopped her again. "Let's do something. Lets go.. to a movie, to eat, to get coffee, something?"

"I don't know." Peyton shrugged. "I should go home."

"And do Coke?"

"Nathan!" she cried. She stopped herself. She shouldn't get angry. The truth was, that's probably what she would do if she went home. "Okay. What do you want to do?"

Peyton grabbed a bucket of popcorn and sat in the isle. "This is not a date." She joked with him.

"Does that mean I won't get laid after word?" he asked joking back with her. She shot him a look. "Guess not."

The two of them became entranced in the movie. The had decided on seeing "The Day After Tomorrow."

"That was really good." Peyton said walking to Nathan's car.

"Yeah it was. It was fun wasn't it?" he asked. She nodded. "Do you want me to take you home now?"

Peyton thought about it for a few seconds and shook her head. "You're right. I probably should look into something to help me with this." She suggested. "Do you want to come with me?"

Nathan agreed. They drove to the library to research what they could about drug problems. Peyton hated to admit that she had a drug problem. "They always say the first step is admitting it right?" she shrugged.

Nathan nodded. "It's going to be okay." He pulled her into a hug.

"Nathan what happened to you?" she asked him.

"What do you mean?"

"You've changed so much. I mean, obviously Haley was the best thing that ever happened to you. So why the change?"

Nathan shrugged. "I guess I wanted to be a better person when I was with her. When it ended, I liked the person I was." He told her. "I wish I would have been that way with you."

"No you don't."

"Yes I do."

"No you don't Nathan. I did the same thing Haley did to you to Brooke."

"No you didn't." he corrected her. "You weren't committed. Lucas was."

"I guess you're right."

"I'm always right." Peyton slapped him in the arm with a book. "Hey!"

Peyton smiled and went back to reading the book. Maybe hanging out with Nathan wouldn't be such a bad thing after all. He really was a great guy.

Deb came home from the café and found Nathan and Peyton sitting on the floor in the living room playing cards. "Hey." She smiled at the sight. "Nate"

They looked up at her and waved. "Want to play?" Peyton asked.

Deb shook her head no. She couldn't believe Nathan had been out of his room for two days. "Did you eat?" she asked them. "I brought home food."

Peyton jumped up. "I'm starving." Deb's smile faded. "But you probably didn't bring any for me, because you figured I wouldn't be here?"

Deb laughed. "Of course I brought you some Peyton. I knew you would be here. You said you wanted help."

Peyton high fived her. "Thank you."

Peyton took the bags into the kitchen and left Deb standing in the living room with Nate. "What's going on?" she asked with a smirk. She liked seeing Peyton and Nathan together.

"Nothing." Nate laughed. "Don't even try it." He pushed passed her. "It's nothing." He tried to convince himself the same thing. The truth was, it wasn't nothing. He wished he would have seen it before Haley, but Peyton was amazing.


	3. Getting Help

This first thing I want to say is HOLY COW! I got an overwhelming response to this fic. Thank you so much for your wonderful reviews. As always, the more reviews I get the more eager I am to write. Its hard for me to find time to write on the weekends, because I have so much time to write at work during the week, but because I got so many reviews, I decided to write a chapter today. Again I want to say, Thank You!

Chapter Three-Getting Help 

Nathan stood at Peyton's side as they walked into the drug counseling office. The two of them hadn't spoken since they left Tree Hill. Nathan drove her to Charleston. After checking in at the front desk the two of them took a seat in the waiting room. "Do you want me to go in with you?" Nathan asked interrupting Peyton's thoughts. Peyton shook her head no.

Peyton had been thinking the same things over and over again since they left tree hill. What if this didn't work? What if as soon as she left Nathan's house she felt alone again and turned back to coke? What if she just collapsed and let her feelings over suicide take over her. What if she wasn't strong enough?

"Your amazingly strong." Nathan spoke.

"Holy shit." She said startled. "That was freaky." He had known exactly what she was thinking. She smiled at him and elbowed him in the arm. The woman called her name. "Here goes." She said standing up. "And Nate? Thanks for coming."

Nathan nodded. He watched his curly haired ex girlfriend follow the woman. She was about to do the hardest thing she'd ever do. She was getting help. He admired her for that.

XoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoX

Peyton didn't speak on the way home from Charleston either. Her counseling had gone well. She was a bit embarrassed to talk to Nathan about it. "Where do you want to go?" Nathan asked as they drove around Tree Hill.

"Home." She suggested.

Nathan wasn't so sure if this was the best idea. "Are you sure?" he asked.

She nodded. When they got to Peyton's house she asked if he wanted to come in. Nathan thought for a second before replying. "Is that an invite or is that one of your questions to make me feel stupid when I come to the door?"

Peyton laughed. She thought about the time she asked that question to Lucas. Lucas was so eager to come inside and then she shot him down. "It's an invite." She climbed out of the car.

Nathan wearily parked the car and followed her inside. The two of them sat down at the kitchen table and Peyton put a pizza in the oven. "When was the last time you saw Haley?"

Nathan didn't want to answer this question. Him and Haley was the last thing he wanted to talk about. "The day she showed up at my door step I guess."

"What did you say to her?"

"I told her that she was right. We were too young when we got married. We both made a mistake. We needed to follow our dreams."

"Then why didn't you go to High flyers?"

Nathan shrugged. "Partly for my mom I guess, and because of my dad. I just don't know about basketball anymore. With my dad gone it would be a lot easier, only it makes it harder."

"What do you mean?"

"My dad was a horrible person. You know how bad he treated me Peyton. But it was my dad. Of course I can't just write it off as another guy in Tree Hill that died."

Peyton knew exactly how he felt. Her mother wasn't really her mother. She was adopted. But the woman lying in that grave would always have her heart. She loved her more than life it's self. But Ellie, the woman who gave birth to her would now take a place in her heart even if she hated her for giving her away. She couldn't hate her. She gave her life, and she gave her the woman she called Mom.

Peyton didn't say anything but Nathan knew she understood him. "Why is everything so different between us now?" Nathan asked. "We used to be so, screwed up."

Peyton sighed. "Because it's not just about sex anymore Nathan. It's about so much more than that."

What did she mean by that? Nathan thought. He quickly corrected himself for thinking that way. Of course it meant it was about friendship.

The two of them sat talking about Peyton's counseling for over an hour. She told him how they were going to write her a prescription for depression. She would have weekly counseling appointments in Tree Hill, and she would go back to Charleston once a month. Smoke started to fill the kitchen, and Peyton remember the pizza. "Shit!" She muttered pulling out the completely burnt pizza.

"How about Chinese?" Nathan suggested opening a window.

"That sounds great!" she accepted.

XoxoxoxoxoxoxoX

Before they knew it, it was dark outside. Peyton and Nathan had been sitting in the Chinese restaurant laughing and talking all night. She knew she was going to have to go home. "I should get going."

Nathan shook his head. "You know, you don't have to go home. My mom is really worried about you. She said you could stay as long as you need to."

"Thank her for me?"

Nathan nodded. "Are you sure you want to go home?"

"Yeah." Peyton told him. "Actually, you know what? Why don't you come over? We could rent a movie, like old times." She suggested.

Nathan suddenly grew nervous. Why would he be nervous around Peyton? He was never nervous with her. Not even in the beginning. "Sure." His phone ringing interrupted him. "Hello?" he answered not recognizing the number.

"Nathan, it's Lucas." Nathan hung up the phone. The last person he wanted to talk to was Lucas. He hadn't spoken to him since he told him they were no longer brothers. Not even at Dan's funeral. Then he found out that Lucas was going to New York with Haley. That was the end of their friendship for good

"Who was that?" Peyton asked.

"Nobody."

"Okay" she accepted when she noticed that now her phone was ringing. "Hello?"

"Peyton, it's Lucas."

"Hi Lucas, what's up?" she asked notincing Nathan rolling his eyes.

"I called Nathan and he hung up on me, have you seen him?"

"No, why would I see Nathan?" she lied.

Nathan smiled.

"Listen Peyton, it's about Haley. She's in the hospital."

"Haley's in the hospital? Why?" Peyton asked worried.

"There was an accident at her show. A light fell from above her and hit her. They don't know if she's going to make it!" Lucas cried.

"Oh my God. I'll try and talk to Nathan and call you back." She hung up the phone and looked up at him. "They don't think Haley is going to make it."

Nathan's heart dropped. Now what was he going to do? He didn't want to see her. She hadn't even come when he was in the hospital. But it was his ex wife, no amount of pain in his heart wanted her to die. He knew what he had to do. "Let's go to New York."


	4. The Big Apple

Chapter Four-The Big Apple 

Welcome to New York. Nathan thought as him and Peyton loaded their bags into the cab. Deb had given them both the money to go to the hospital. Peyton had a hard time accepting money from Deb but knew she would never afford to go to New York with out it.

The two of them looked around at the city as they drove. "Sucks that our first time in New York has to be under these circumstances." Peyton mumbled, as the cab driver pulled into the hotel Deb reserved for them.

Peyton followed Nathan to the check in desk carrying a cart with their bags on it. She had over packed by a lot. They didn't know how long they would be staying. "Nathan Scott." He told the man. "My mom made reservations for two double beds."

The man nodded, "I do have reservations for you sir, but we only have one room available with a king size bed."

"That's okay," Nathan told him. "Can we just get a cot?"

"I'm sorry. It's a very busy weekend for us this time of the year. Tourist love New York in the summer. We don't have any cots available."

Peyton stepped forward. "That's fine." She told them both. "It's just fine."

Nathan fell back on the bed and smiled at Peyton staring. "Come to poppa." He patted the side of the bed for her to sit down.

"You've got to be kidding me." She rolled her eyes.

"What, it's not like we haven't slept in the same bed before." He winked. "You know you want this."

"Your disgusting," she laughed. "Lets just get our stuff put away and go to the hospital.

Nathan nodded and followed her to the dressers where she was unpacking her clothes. "Thanks for coming with me Peyton. I wouldn't have come alone."

"Welcome buddy. Thanks for bringing me. I wouldn't have been able to come if it weren't for your mom."

The two of them found a cab to take them to the hospital. When they walked inside they found Lucas sitting in the waiting room one the phone. "Haley's parents." He mouthed the words as he hugged Peyton.

Nathan nodded at him and sat down. When Lucas hung up the phone he thanked the both for coming. "Do you know anything?" Nathan asked.

Lucas shook his head. It was obvious that he had been crying. "She was singing and a light fell from above her. It knocked her out. They are saying she may have severe brain damage and memory loss if she makes it through. They say if she makes it at all it would be a miracle."

Nathan didn't speak. He wasn't sure how to feel. He had just lost his father, and now he was about to loose the woman he spent so much time caring for. The woman he previously married.

Peyton excused herself to the bathroom. She stood in the stall holding the small little baggy in front of her face. She was considering doing coke again. She didn't know why it was so tempting to her; she just knew that if she didn't do it, she would loose control when she talked to the doctor.

She reached into her purse and pulled out a small compact where she poured the contents of the baggy. After she snorted it she flushed the baggy down the toilet. She would feel better now. She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled. She could feel the effect already.

It was freezing when she reached Nathan and Lucas sitting silently in the waiting room. Nathan stood up when she came in and smiled. "Do you want to go down to the cafeteria and get something to eat?" he asked her.

Peyton shook her head no. "I, um, am not hungry." She knew Nathan was going to catch on eventually but she knew that if she went downstairs to eat it would be even more obvious.

"Okay," he sighed. He looked at Lucas. "Do you want anything?"

Lucas nodded. "Do you think you could get me some coffee?" he asked throwing him some money.

Nathan nodded. He hadn't wanted to be nice to Lucas, but he felt bad for him. He knew how much it was killing him to wait. Plus, he had seen the accident. "Do you want to walk with me Peyton?"

Peyton accepted. There was no way she would be able to sit still with Lucas in the waiting room.

"Peyton wait up." Nathan called to her. She was walking about 50 feet ahead of him. "What are you in such a hurry for?" he asked.

"I don't know," she smiled. "I just felt like walking fast."

Nathan didn't accept this answer. He grabbed onto her arm and spun her around to face him. Her eyes were watering and glazed over. "Peyton, did you do coke?" he whispered.

Peyton grew nervous at his accusation. She started to cry. She nodded. She felt Nathan hold her tightly in his arms. She stood there holding him back, crying. When she looked up she saw Lucas watching them down the hall. She wasn't sure what took over her but she reached up, pulled Nathan close to her and kissed him.


	5. Returns & Goodbyes

**Chapter Five-Returns & Goodbyes**

Nathan hadn't spoken since Peyton kissed him. They were sitting in the cafeteria. Nathan was eating a sandwich. Peyton was playing with the hamburger he bought her. She couldn't eat. He knew why. He had run out of explanations for the kiss. It could have been the coke. It could have been Lucas. The only explanation he refused to accept was the fact that she had feelings for him.

"Are you mad at me?" Peyton asked out of the blue. "Because I'm sorry."

Nathan shook his head. "I'm not mad. Just confused."

"About drugs or the kiss?" she asked.

"Both." He told her honestly. "I know that it's an addiction Peyton. But I thought we were both trying really hard to work past it. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know." She shrugged. "I guess I thought that you had too much on your mind. I know that you didn't want to have to be taking care of me at a time like this. You have enough to worry about with Haley."

He nodded. She was right. He didn't want to have to be taking care of her. He would though. She was his friend. He would do whatever she needed of him. And he wanted to. "What about the kiss?"

Peyton shrugged. "I'm sorry."

"So it didn't mean anything?"

"Of course it meant something." She smiled. "Nathan, I really appreciate everything you've done for me. You've really been there for me the past couple of days. Even the past couple of months when Jake was in jail; you were the only one who understood the way I was feeling. I'm really thankful for that. Sometimes I see the way you are now, compared to the way you were when I was with you. Sometimes I think if we were together now, things would be different."

Nathan knew they would be. But was he ready to jump into something with Peyton? They were both covered in issues. Nathan had too much to think about right now. He couldn't. He wouldn't. "I'm sorry Peyton; I just have so much on my mind."

"It's okay, I understand." She agreed. She stood up and walked away from him.

XoxoxoX

Lucas was sitting in the waiting room hugging Brooke when Peyton walked in. "P. Sawyer!" Brooke exclaimed running over to her friend and throwing her into a hug.

"Hey," Peyton smiled. She was excited to see Brooke. At the same time, she wasn't. She wasn't ready to confess her addiction to her. Plus Brooke could read her like a book. She knew she would immediately question her relationship with Nathan. "I missed you."

"I know, California Is horrible. The parties are fun, but the boys definitely are not as cute as Lucas." She smiled. "Come for a walk with me, we'll catch up." She said locking arms with her.

The girls walked slowly down the hallway as they passed Nathan. "Nate," Brooke smiled nodding her head.

"Brooke," he replied and kept walking.

"Well what the hell? Why didn't he say hi to you?" Brooke asked Peyton.

Peyton shrugged. "We sort of came together."

Brooke's eyes lit up. "Do I smell a rekindling romance with former married guy?" she smiled. "P. Sawyer, you whoe!"

"Brooke," Peyton sighed. "Don't go there."

"Fine, fine, but I'm telling you, the way he looked at you, he totally wants on you."

Peyton rolled her eyes and continued walking.

XoxoxoxoX

Nathan sat down next to Lucas when the doctor came in. The doctor took his surgeon cap off and sighed. "Are Ms. James' parents here?" he asked.

Lucas shook his head. "I'm her, brother in law." He told the doctor shaking his hand.

"Former brother in law." Nathan corrected him. "And I'm her ex husband."

The doctor looked down at his clip board and nodded. "Alright, I need a number for Haley's parents."

Lucas handed him a slip of paper. "Is she okay?"

Peyton and Brooke were now joining the two. "I'm afraid there were complications during surgery."

"What kind of complications?" Peyton asked. "Is she okay?"

The doctor shook his head no. "I'm afraid she didn't make it." Nathan felt his heart hit the floor. The next thing he knew he was on his knees in tears. Peyton immediately rushed to his side to hug him. "I'm really sorry," the doctor told them. "I'll give you a few minuets before someone comes out to talk to you about where to go from here."

Lucas' expression was cold. He felt Brooke holding onto him but he couldn't feel anything. He was in shock. He watched Nathan and Peyton on the floor holding each other crying. Brooke even had tears coming from her eyes. Lucas couldn't do anything but stand there in shock.

Haley's parents rushed into the hospital a few minuets after the doctor told everyone what happened. The doctor hadn't been able to contact them during their commute. Lucas looked at them with worry. He glanced in Nathan's direction hoping for help. "They don't know." He whispered.

"She's gone," Nathan blurted out. "She's gone"


	6. The Funeral

**Chapter Six-The Funeral**

The funeral came and went quickly. Nathan had stood silently as Lucas spoke of Haley. He hadn't said anything. He couldn't say anything. He had no idea what to say. Brooke had come, Peyton stood at her side. Everyone else in Tree Hill who had ever met Haley seemed to come as well.

Nathan was tired of funerals. First his dad, now Haley. He knew exactly what would make him feel better. He left the funeral and went home. He reached into his top dresser drawer and pulled out a bottle of vodka. After taking a few sips he watched Peyton walk in.

"Hey." She said looking down at the bottle. "Why are you drinking?"

"Why are you doing coke?"

Peyton was shocked by this question. Clearly he was mad at her. "I'm not doing coke." She told him. "If I had seen you since we got back from New York, you would know that."

"Sorry Peyton, I'm not in the mood for an argument."

"Whatever Nathan, I guess I was wrong about you after all." She slammed the door and left his house.

Nathan sat staring at the door that was slammed in front of him. "Whatever," he muttered and he took another drink from the bottle.

It didn't take Nathan long to get drunk. He hadn't eaten anything all day, not to mention his emotions were completely out of control. He got in his car and drove to Peyton's house.

Peyton looked up from the picture she was drawing and saw Nathan stumble into her bedroom. "Wow," he admired her walls. "This is cool."

"Nathan," she stood up walking over to him to stop him from falling. "Did you drive over here like that?"

Nathan nodded. "I had to see you. I had to tell you the truth Peyton. I had to." He grabbed her by the arm and kissed her.

Peyton kissed him back with passion. Being so close to him had never felt so right. She felt at home for the first time since she had seen Jake. She needed him. Finally she pulled away. "Nathan you're drunk."

Nathan nodded, "But it doesn't change how I feel. I guess I've been avoiding you, because I was scared."

Peyton helped him onto her bed and laid with him until they both fell asleep.

XoxoxoX

Brooke and Lucas stumbled into Peyton's bedroom after drinking for hours. Brooke started laughing when she saw Nathan passed out next to Peyton. "P. Sawyer" Brooke started to yell but Lucas covered her mouth.

"Maybe we shouldn't wake them," he warned.

"Maybe we should," she giggled crawling next to her best friend and kissing her cheek.

"Nathan," Peyton whispered. "I told you we could talk about this in the morning,"

Brooke laughed hysterically. "P. Sawyer get up!" she ordered.

Peyton jumped when she heard Brooke's voice. "What the hell?" she asked staring at Brooke and Lucas. "Are you both drunk too?"

Lucas nodded slightly and shrugged. "Are you?" he laughed.

Peyton shook her head.

"Well isn't that funny, you're not even drunk and here you are asleep next to my boyfriend's brother. Or should I say, your former boyfriend's brother. Or actually, should I say your former boyfriend?" Brooke laughed. "How screwed up was that?"

Lucas laughed with her. "That is kind of messed up."

Peyton smiled at the two of them. "You guys are nuts. Don't wake Nathan up. It's nothing. He was drunk and upset so he came here. Clearly the two of you had the same idea. Aren't you going back to California tomorrow?"

Brooke shook her head. "Nope, my parents are letting me stay!" she exclaimed. "I'm staying with Lucas again for the rest of the summer, and then they are coming back to help me find an apartment for senior year! We'll finally be able to hang out again best friend!"

Peyton smiled. She was excited to be getting Brooke back. She missed having her friend. She was also disappointed that she was probably going to loose the closeness she shared with Nathan. "Come on boozy and boozette." She giggled making room for them in her bed.

XoxoxoxoxoxoxoX

Nathan woke up and looked around Peyton's room. "What am I doing here?" he whispered. He saw Peyton typing in her computer chair. He looked over and saw Brooke next to him and Lucas next to her asleep. "What the hell?" he asked motioning toward Peyton in confusion.

"That was a sick fantasy you had last night Nate," she elbowed him. Nathan looked at her un-amused. "Sorry,"

"What am I doing here?"

"You don't remember?" Peyton asked sadly.

Nathan shook his head no. "Well actually, yes. I know that I came here to see you. I know what I told you. But why is Brooke and Lucas sharing a bed with me?"

Peyton smiled. He remembered. "Apparently they had the same idea you did last night. They got wasted and came here."

Nathan nodded. "Did they confess their feelings for you too?"

Peyton shook her head. "Actually, I did wake up from Brooke kissing me."

"What?" Nathan's eyes lit up.

"On the cheek."

"Still, I wish I could have seen it." He sighed. He pulled her close to him and kissed her. "I still meant everything I said."


	7. Growing Closer

**Chapter Seven-Growing Closer**

Peyton looked at the clock and sighed. She was waiting for Nathan to get to her house. It had been two weeks since Haley's funeral. Her and Nathan had been together a lot over the past couple weeks. They decided to hold off on dating unless it was casual. They didn't consider their relationship serious. Tonight Peyton decided she was going to have an end of summer party.

Nathan arrived over and hour late. He was holding a case of beer in one hand and a pink rose in the other hand. "Thanks," Peyton smiled. "You know that pink roses mean friendship right?"

Nathan nodded. "Just ignore the color. It's a rose isn't it?"

Peyton smiled and kissed him on the cheek. "Also, you know that Brooke got us a keg right?"

Nathan sighed. "I just can't do anything right can I?"

"You do things right." She laughed. "Well save this, I'm sure someone will drink it." She put it in her dad's fridge. "Hopefully my dad doesn't pick tonight to come home." Nathan looked worried. "I'm kidding! He's gone for another two weeks. I talked to him this morning."

"Have you ever had a party here before?" Nathan asked.

Peyton thought about this for a second. "I don't think so. The parties were usually at your house, or Brooke's."

"Did I hear my name?" Brooke chimed in entering the room with Lucas at her side.

Nathan and Lucas started talking again. Nathan didn't want to admit it but he missed his brother. They weren't back on friendly terms, he just decided against enemies. "You always manage to show up at just the wrong times Brooke."

"What does that mean?" she asked pretending to be hurt.

"I was about to take Peyton's clothes off."

"Ew!" Brooke covered her eyes. "Ew!"

Peyton laughed and grabbed her friend by the arm. "How about some help with that keg?" she suggested.

"Well of course best friend!" she smiled. "I wouldn't miss this for the world. Peyton Sawyer, moody cheerleader throws party of the summer."

"About that," Peyton said turning to her. "I don't know if I'm going to do cheerleading this year."

Brooke's face dropped. "You're kidding right? P. Sawyer, I need you!"

Peyton's face softened. She didn't want to do cheerleading. She was tired of faking something she wasn't. This however meant a lot to Brooke. "Fine," she muttered. "But only if you make sure this night is killer."

"Oh, it's already underway." She smiled taking a drink of the newly tapped keg. "Cheers!"

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo

"Brooke Davis!" Peyton exclaimed stumbling up the stairs to her bedroom. She had been drinking for almost two hours straight with no sign of Brooke. She opened her door and found her best friend making out with Lucas on the bed. "No!" she cried.

Brooke jumped at the sound of Peyton's voice. "Damn it!" Brooke wined. "Five more minuets mom?"

Peyton rolled her eyes. "Brooke Davis, you promised me a night of fun!"

Brooke jumped up from the bed and told Lucas she would be back. She linked arms with Peyton and walked down the stairs. "Fine, I'll give you twenty minuets of my sweet ass, and then I'm back upstairs with Lucas."

"Fine," Peyton accepted.

"20 minuets of ass huh Brooke? I thought you could go longer than that," Nathan joked coming up behind the two girls.

"Oh, I can." She winked at him. "But my best friend here would get a little tired out."

Nathan blushed. "That's hot."

"I bet you think so," Brooke laughed pulling Peyton away from him. She called a group of people into the kitchen to play a game. "Okay, we're going to play Brooke says."

"What?" Peyton asked laughing. "That's not a game."

"It is now. Whatever I say goes."

"I don't think I like this game," one of the cheerleaders protested.

"Well that's just too bad." She smiled. "Mouth!" she called eyeing him in the back of the circle. "Brooke says, drink two shots of Bacardi 151."

Mouth picked up the Bacardi bottle and poured himself two shots. "I think instead of this whole Brooke says game, it should be Mouth says. Tim, kiss Brooke."

"Oh my God, ew!" Brooke cried. Tim smiled at Brooke and walked closer to her. Lucas stood in the doorway watching. He pressed his lips against hers and Brooke quickly pushed him away. "Enough, Enough!"

"I guess now it's Tim says. Tim says, Nathan, take your shirt off."

Nathan gave Tim a disgusted look. "Are you kidding?" Tim shook his head no. "Man, you're retarded." Nathan said taking his shirt off.

"Nathan says, Brooke, make out with Peyton for 30 seconds."

"Excuse me?" Peyton asked.

Brooke laughed. "Why does everyone always have to make out with me?"

"I just figured, most of us would enjoy that, so why not?" Nathan laughed.

"Didn't you enjoy it enough on dare night?" Peyton asked.

Nathan shook his head. Tim grabbed his camera phone to take a picture. Peyton grabbed Brooke and pulled her into a kiss. "Happy?" she smiled at him when she was done.

"Satisfied." Nathan smiled.

"I guess its Brooke's turn again." Peyton pointed out.

Brooke smiled. "Nathan, take Peyton upstairs." She giggled. She winked at her best friend. "I hope I made your night good enough. Now I'm going back upstairs with Lucas." She smiled. She ended the game.

XoXoXoXoXoXoXoXoXo

Nathan stood next to Peyton in her dad's bedroom. "We don't have to do anything Peyton."

Peyton shrugged. "Brooke says." She smiled shyly. "It's not like we haven't done It before anyway,"

Nathan smiled back at her. He bent down and kissed her. "Peyton, I know we're only doing the casual thing, but I want to be with you."

Peyton nodded and kissed him back. "You can most definitely be with me."

"I mean together. In a serious relationship."

Peyton pulled away. She remembered when Lucas told her that. Then she remembered when Jake did. She was scared to get her heart broken again. This was Nathan, he treated her poorly once. He was changed now, she could tell it would be different so she nodded her head and kissed him again. "Okay," she whispered. "Okay."


	8. Seniors The End

**Chapter Eight-Seniors**

Peyton held tightly onto Nathan's hand as they entered the high school. It was their senior year. They would graduate this year. She smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek before letting go of his hand. "This should be fun," she muttered as she joined Brooke and some other cheerleaders talking at a table outside.

"Hey there best friend" Brooke smiled at her watching her sit down and Nathan take off in the other direction. "I see that you're extra smiley today. Did you enjoy your evening with my boyfriend's brother last night?"

Peyton rolled her eyes. "Sure, thanks Brooke." She knew that was what she was looking for. The truth was, Peyton couldn't stop thinking about coke. She had a counseling appointment after school in Charlotte. She had been doing great since Haley's accident. She wasn't even considering it. Today however, she felt enormous pressure on her.

Brooke grabbed Peyton's hand and directed her eyes away from the school. "Peyton," she sighed. "I don't think you want to go in there yet,"

"What?" Why?" Let go of me," Peyton laughed pulling away from her. "I'll see you in class." She started to walk toward the door when she noticed Jake standing outside of it waiting for her. "Oh my God." She whispered. "Oh my God."

"Peyton," Jake smiled walking up to her and pulling her into a hug. "Peyton, I missed you so much."

"Did you get Jenny back?" she asked him excited to see him but nervous at the same time.

Jake nodded. "We can finally be together. Finally, Peyton." Peyton could feel tears falling down her face. "What's wrong?"

"Jake." She whispered. "I missed you."

"I missed you too." He told her.

"I didn't think you were coming back.." she started. "I.."

"You what?" he asked. "Everything is okay now, everything," he smiled. "We can be here, together, with Jenny."

Peyton shook her head. "We can't," she whispered again. "We can't."

"Why not?" he pulled away.

"Because I moved on." She told him. "I'm so sorry Jake, I moved on."

XoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoX

Nathan walked to Lucas' locked and said hello. He had been so happy lately he decided to forgive Lucas completely. Being with Peyton had changed him in more ways than Haley had. Not only was he committed, he knew that Peyton was happy being with him without moving as quickly as he and Haley had.

Nathan saw Peyton walk into the school in tears. Jake wasn't far behind her. "Oh." He said sadly.

Lucas noticed the disappointment in his face. "I'm sure it's nothing man,"

Nathan shook his head. "She loved him. It's not nothing, there is no way it could be nothing."

He watched as Peyton walked toward him. Jake turned a corner and went the other way. Peyton walked directly to Nathan and pulled him to hug her. He held her and let her cry. He didn't say a word.

Lucas left the two of them standing in the hallway when the bell for school to start rang. Peyton didn't care. She wanted to hold Nathan in her arms forever. "I love you," she whispered.

"I love you too." He told her back. "Are you okay?"

Peyton nodded. That was the truth. Jake had been her weakness and she had overcome it. She had overcome her addiction and overcome her fear of love. What more could she battle? She knew it didn't matter anymore. She could handle anything, and with Nathan at her side, she was unstoppable.

**I know this story was kind of short, but I felt like this was a good place to end it. I hope that you liked it. Please send reviews. I'm going to start a new story shortly.-Brittney**


End file.
